Category Archives: brooklyn

Hunting for Spots

Posted on by
1

Interesting post on Brokelyn about  finding free parking in Brooklyn, and other apps and tools to find spots (and how to get out of parking tickets.)  Unfortunately they did not mention the awesome map on Brooklyn.com that has a Google map of Park Slope that shows which day and which side of the street has alternate site parking. Between that map (which I’ve pretty much memorized) and the Twitter @NYCASP I’m usually ready for the hunt.

I spend way to much time looking for parking, and I often consider that it is not worth having a car in the city, the convenience it offers really doesn’t equal the aggravation it causes.

But I’m a little obsessed with parking. I get a perverse thrill looking for a spot.  In addition to it being one of the few times I get some solitude, I get a real adrenaline rush when I squeeze into a spot that I know others have passed because they thought it was too small. I know there are others hunting for spots, and there are not enough empty spaces for everyone, so every edge counts.

When to look for a spot- morning or night?
I prefer evening. There is more pressure in the morning to find a spot before work, and it creates a lot of aggression from other drivers. Also I’ve found that there is less competition in the evenings, the search time is spread out over a longer period.

What is the best weekday to look for a spot?
If you are lucky to get a Friday spot, then Thursday night is the best, the largest inventory of spots are available where you wont have to move it again until after the weekend.

What is the worst weekday to look for a spot?
Monday night is terrible.  Unless you want to move your car again that week, you only have Monday spots available, and people with Tuesday-Friday spots probably aren’t moving from their space until they need to.  Mondays are brutal, expect 30 minutes minimum for find a Monday spot.

Tip 1: Know where the fire hydrants are. Don’t waste time slowing down for a non-spot. Nothing is more annoying as a guy in front of you who slows down at every pump, “Is this a spot? No.  Is this a spot? No.”  Yr killing me!

Tip 2: Know how big you car is, dont waste time trying to get in a spot you dont fit in, and NEVER pass up a space that you think is just a bit too small.   You can get into a spot that is only 6 inches longer than your car, it takes patience, but it can be done. I’ve gotten into spots with only 2 inches from the cars in front and behind me.

What is your parking technique? Do you keep circling back looking for the nearest “dream spot” hoping someone will pull out or when the “dream spot” isn’t available, cut your losses and widen the search area?

How often do you get your “dream spot”?

How long will you look for a spot before giving up and taking a spot that you’ll need to move again in a day or two?

Do you call it s spot or a space?

Homeland Security as Art

Posted on by
Reply

Spotted in Union Square subway

Apparently someone thought  the industrial looking unmarked air sensor in the Union Square subway station looked like an art installation on loan from a museum.  All that was missing was the museum plaque with a title and esoteric description:

If You See Something, Say Something

Unidentified large vibrating metal object (with vent) on heavily populated Union Square subway station concourse

On loan from Free Admission exhibits, 2011

Citizens Police extensively trained by the Department of Homeland Security’s advertising campaign, wander past this extremely suspicious device with occasional and momentary curiosity.

Unmarked, unmanned, and unfriendly, it provides an excellent source of fear, thanks to its menacing appearance and complete lack of explanation.

Apparently this is part of a series of “art” pieces from Free Admissions Exhibits

Air sensor before it became art.

What Makes You a New Yorker?

Posted on by
1

I noticed something in all the hubbub about the Prospect Park West bike lanes, blog commenters frequently feel the need to state they were born in New York City, and how long they have lived there. Somehow because they exited their mother’s womb in the confines of the Five Boroughs, it entitles them to more credibility. They often refer  to non-native New Yorkers as “transplants”, and these “transplants” are usually  complicit in the destruction of the fabric of new york.  And the craziest thing is the so-called “transplants” buy into this malarkey and often allow them selves to be cowed buy these native-son-of-a -guns.

So let me clear up what makes you a New Yorker:

You were born and raised in Midwood, Brooklyn?  Congratulations, you are a New Yorker!

You moved to New York City last month from Chillicothe, Ohio (and you managed to find a job and a place to live)? Congratulations, you are a New Yorker!

How much of one’s vested interest in their community is based on birthplace?  I see plenty of “native” New Yorkers treat their city like a garbage dump.  In fact, I think it is longtime New York residents make change (even for the better) more difficult.  The “born and raised” are often overly tolerant of Gotham’s daily assaults (crime, pollution, rotting infrastructure.)  B & Rs often haven’t lived anywhere else, so they do not know any different way.

And because of that they a very quick to defend any on the city’s deficiencies with statements like:

“If you can’t take it, move back to Iowa!”

“Yea, but we got [some great thing about New York]”

“Only in New York”

(I love this city, but I’m sorry, “only in New York” doesn’t cut it as a response to someone complaining that a homeless person is using their foyer as a bathroom.)

So let’s give the “transplants” the benefit of the doubt.  Coming to New York with a different point of view is what keeps the city vibrant. Transplants often give a dying body new life.

Here is a list of a few New York Transplants who made New York what it is and
Patti Smith – Born in Chicago, moved to New York from Deptford Township, New Jersey
Sarah Jessica Parker – Was born and raised in Ohio.
Jane Jacobs – Moved to New York City from Scranton, PA.
Bob Dylan – Born in Duluth, Minnesota
John Lennon – Born in Liverpool, England
Andy Warhol – Born in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

(fwiw- I was born in East Flatbush, Brooklyn and moved to Long Island before elementary school.  I went to college in upstate New York and since I’ve lived in Hoboken, NJ, the Upper East Side, Williamsbug, the West Village, and Park Slope.)

Rethinking The Park Slope Food Coop

Posted on by
2

I have written about the Park Slope Food Coop in the past.  From a strictly economic perspective (not considering the draconian penalties, long lines, or the cult-like demeanor of some members) I decided that the savings gained from shopping at the Coop was not worth the 2 hours and 45 minutes.  But I based this on a” back of the envelope” estimates on how much a family might save every month by shopping at the Coop.

But today the Park Slope Patch had a very nice article comparing the price of 20 items at five Park Slope stores: Back to The Land, Key Food on 5th, Met Food on 7th, the Park Slope Food Coop, and Union Market. Among some no brainers, like don’t buy prosciutto at Met Foods, there was a lot if interesting tidbits, like Back to the Land  is cheaper than Key Food. But most interesting was that the average item at the Food Coop was $1.32 less than Back to the Land, the next cheapest store per item.

Although this was hardly a scientific study, it did give me a metric I did not have before.  With fees and working 71.5 hours a year (2 adults) at minimum wage, the first year at the Food Coop will cost you $768 your first year.  With an average savings of $1.32 an item, if you shop every other week and get 25 items each week, you’d save $858 a year, a net gain of 90 bucks! And you’d get $340 in saving each year after that (once you “pay off” the $250 in fees.)

I’m still not sure I’m ready for the Food Coop (do all members really have to wear matching Nike sneakers, or is that just a rumor?) but knowing the real savings might ease my mind when I’m wearing that day glow Food Coop vest.

My Calculations

Hours/Week number of adults Hours worked per year Min. Wage What it costs you to work at the Food Coop (plus $250 in “fees”)
2.75 2 71.5 $7.25 $518.38
Number of items Average Savings per item # of Shops per year Savings per year
25 1.32 26 $ 858.00
Net gain $ 339.63

17 Prospect Park West Manision Renovation Finished!

Posted on by
1

The Park Slope Patch has heavily staged pics of the much hoopla-ed renovation of the 17 Prospect Park West Victorian mansion.  Formerly the abode of movie stars Jennifer Connelly and Paul Bettany, it was bought in 2009 by a Google engineer, and locals and the blogerati were worried that the new owners would gut the “old world charm.” I’ve always admired this beautiful limestone townhouse, and when I saw scaffolding surrounding the place for a year, I thought they would do a down-to-the-studs renovation.  But it looks like they kept a lot of the original detail (and stuffed it with a lot of velvet furniture, even in the children’s room!  Maybe “Google-raised” kids aren’t constantly covered in jam and syrup like my kids.)  It really does look beautiful, but why do modern refurbs feel compelled to make bathrooms look like they are in a nightclub?

Parlor

Dining area

Perfect for the kids to bust out the magic markers on a play-date

Kitchen

Who doesn’t keep a wide array of melons and gourds splayed on their kitchen table?

Family room

I know its hard to take your eyes off the Danish/caveman club chair, but notice the high-chair?
Adult furniture from the future, children’s furniture from Amish country.

Child's room

The boots and blocks say, “we have a toddler.” The pink velvet chair says, “we can afford to have it re-upholstered”

Kitchen-level bath

I can practically hear “In Da Club” blastin’!

Dos and Don’ts of the Young and Childless in Bars.

Posted on by
Reply

For some reason the question of “babies in bars” really puts a burr in some people’s knickers, so when the Fort Greene beirgarten Der Schwarze Kölner, started offering playgroups for parents with kids, the NYTimes wrote a piece in “The Local” blog called “The Dos and Don’ts of Babies and Bars.”

After the obligatory barrage of comments saying children don’t belong in bars, I thought, “Why do they care?” What ever happened to live and let live? Is a mothers’ group chatting with their infants really interfering with the hardcore alcoholics slowly killing themselves?  My general attitude is if an establishment wants to be friendly to parents (usually during the dead Noon to 5pm doldrums) it is their prerogative, and would behoove them financially in bedroom communities like Fort Greene and Park Slope.

But since The New York Times brought it up, in their incredibly offensive and condescending way, here is my

Dos and Don’ts of the Young and Childless in Bars.

Try to find an establishment that caters to you: If you are gay or a minority or young or old, make sure you only go to an establishment that caters to your “kind.” Going to a bar that doesn’t might offend the clientelle.

Choose carefully: You do not want to find yourself at a bar that is playing Bryan Adams in a non-ironic way, or find yourself in Jackie’s 5th Amendment a very uncomfortable conversation with a gentleman demanding to know what elementary school you went to, in order to derive your Brooklyn pedigree.

When in doubt, call ahead: While some bars are filled with bitter, bigoted alcoholics, some are local meeting places were people can have a drink and a conversation and you want to avoid those at all costs.

Find your niche: Try not to mix with people who aren’t like you, maybe find a nice ghetto corner set apart from everyone else.

Don’t bring your giant backpack or rolling luggage that you think is appropriate to carry with you all times: Bars are small enough as it is without having to navigate a baggage carousel to get to the bar.  Here’s a hint, if you aren’t at an airport bar, leave the luggage at home.

Plan an exit strategy: Please imbibe as much as you wish, pull a Dylan Thomas for all I care, but if you can’t puke or can’t stand, its time to take it outside.

Any other suggestions? Or do you think the childless should simply keep out of the bars? Please weigh in below.

BTW- I’m guessing its just youth hubris when people write “I work at a bar…and we are all secretly hating you and your kids.” Well, I don’t hate you, because I was you, and in all reality, you will be the one at least considering bringing you child to a bar in 10 years.  Here’s the thing, most people will become parents, and we were all once children, so I don’t know where all the hate comes from.  But when you are 25, you think that is the way life is, and it will always be.

Brooklyn Brood at Brooklyn Bowl

Posted on by
Reply

I would never call myself an athlete, but I have played in organized football, basketball, baseball and lacrosse; and I’m not exactly an extreme sports enthusiast, but I’ve gone rock climbing, skiing, and mountain biking.  Which is why it surprises me that I received a wound that will surely be my biggest scar this weekend… while bowling!

We went to Brooklyn Bowl on Saturday, the rock club cum bowling alley is open to all ages noon to 6 on weekends.  And while it isn’t necessarily “child friendly,” I found it to be a great place to take my my 3 1/2 year old son.  With bumper bowing, children’s movies on the TVs, and a very friendly staff, on top of excellent food by Blue Ribbon and a full bar, it makes for a nice afternoon.  Don’t expect to find changing tables or high chairs; this is a Williamsburg rock club after all, not Chuck E Cheese.  But the menu has plenty to offer the discriminating toddler, including excellent fried chicken, and stellar mac and cheese.  In addition to the very comfortable couches and tables behind the lanes, there are picnic tables and a wide open space for kids to run around, while that night’s band loads in on the adjacent stage.  My only complaint would be the price, $25/half-hour per lane adds up fast, especially when your child’s bowling ball takes over a minute to finally make it to the pins.

I think some of the fried chicken may have gotten on the soles of my shoes, because after eating between the 8th and 9th frames, I completely fell on my face forward on my delivery, with my knee breaking my fall.  I threw a gutter ball, then unbelievably I picked up the spare.  I them inspected my throbbing knee, and saw the skin had been pulled away from a two inch square on my knee.  A small price to pay for a lovely afternoon, and to see Nate have this much fun:

My New Hyper-Empathy

Posted on by
Reply

There is a story in the NY Times Magazine about a 1 year old buy who suffered brain damage, and whether it was cause by shaken baby syndrome or some other cause. At least I think that what it was about, as I couldn’t read past the first page of the 7 page article. As with many articles about child abuse, or the tragic death of child, I felt sick to my stomach when reading about it. I’m not talking metaphorically, I actually had to swallow to keep myself from becoming physically ill.

This never used to happen before I had children. I would read horrifying stories and I’d get angry, and feel sympathy for the parents and children, but I could get through them without wanting to vomit. Not anymore.

I’m wonder if my hyper-empathy will ever fade, or if I even want it to. But it does amaze me at yet another thing I never expected that changes after I had children.

Tall Boy, Small Stroller

Posted on by
Reply

My 3-year-old son is tall, very tall. He is often mistaken for a 5-year-old and the normal antics of a 3-year-old can seem like the behavior of a troubled first grader.  But this doesn’t bother me as much as the looks he gets when he falls asleep in the stroller.  He still takes a midday nap, and when we’re out, he falls asleep in the stroller, perfectly normal for a 3-year-old. Except when I’m coming home with my napping boy splayed out in a stroller that is just too small, it looks like a have a drugged child in a wheelbarrow, or worse, another spoiled “Park Slope brat” who refuses to walk and needs to be chauffeured everywhere.  Hey gets stared at as we walk by. People actually stop us and tell me “he’s too old to be in a stroller.”  My wife usually snaps, “he’s only 3.”  I usually ignore them or say “Then I’m glad your opinion means nothing to me.”  But the worst was when a deranged homeless guy followed us yelling “get up and fuckin’ walk!”
And this is with the biggest stroller available.  What’s a sleepy tall boy too do?